That Does Impress Me Much

One of my most popular posts - as listed in that nifty little widget on the side - is Unlikely People I Find Attractive. Now, while many have described my 'type' of man as, let's say, unconventional, I'm not a complete freak and wouldn't pass up Ryan Gosling for David Cameron at a Full Moon Party (what an image). So, for a bit of fun on a Wednesday night (social life's looking a bit bleak at the moment), I thought I'd put together a little list of things that 'tickle my fancy', if you will. Also it gives me an excuse - as if I needed one - to look up hot guys on google images for 'future reference'...if you catch my drift. Right, before this gets awkward, here are the Top 10 Things That Impress Me Much. 

1. Designer Stubble

I, perhaps fortunately, cannot grow facial hair - at least none as spectacular as a man's. Therefore, I find it quite impressive when a guy manages to grow some. Here are some examples of what I would describe as some top quality beards; 'chinspiration', if you like.

Jamie Dornan: The Vulnerable Beard

Ryan Gosling: The Strong Beard

David Gandy: The Sophisticated Man-Beard

2. Bone Structure

Call me strange, but I'm an absolute sucker for a good pair of cheekbones. They're pretty much arrows to the mouth, which in my books, makes them like 'sex lines' for the face (more on that later). Here are some great examples:

I do not know this beautiful man's name, but if anyone does, please give him my number.

Ian Somerhalder

Ben Allen

3. Smoking

Yes, it's bad for you. Yes, you might taste like an ashtray. But as one of my favourite men of all time said in his movie Rebel Without A Cause, "live fast, die young" - and if you look this good doing it, it's worth it, right?

Hayden Christenson

Leonardo Di Caprio

James Dean

4. Tattoos

Because everyone likes a bad boy, and I enjoy hearing the stories that go with them. They also make for a great conversation starter, in case you ever need one: "Oh my god, I love your tattoo! Do you have any other ones?" Bingo. 

Jamie Campbell-Bower

David Beckham

Bradley Soileau

5. Arms

Maybe it's been engrained in us through years of living in caves, but I defy you to find me a woman who finds chicken arms attractive in a man. Men are not supposed to be dainty. If they were, then we'd pretty much all be lesbians. That's my theory and I'm sticking to it. Just don't buy me any tickets to a 'gun show', please.

Marky Mark Wahlberg

Gerard Butler

Ryan Gosling

6. Sex Lines

Ok, time to get intimate. Ladies, you know what I'm talking about and gents - if you don't, just look at these pictures.

Linus Gustin

Jamie Dornan

Christiano Ronaldo

7. Hands

I cannot explain it, not even through the use of photos. But you have got to have good, strong, manly hands. Hands that look like they could win a tug-of-war, rather than play the piano. Grr. HANDS.

8. Smile

It's got to make me smile, so it better be a good one. With a hint of cheekiness, if you please. Take a cue from these guys:

Harry Styles - I don't care if he's underage.

Leonardo Di Caprio - and you wonder how he got Rose to pose naked for him...

Jake Gyllenhaal

9. Eyes

I have very normal, very boring, brown eyes. I like guys who have a little spice - green, grey, blue, I really don't care, as long as they can undress me with them. Too much? Let's just look at some pictures then.

Peter O'Toole

Jude Law

Jared Leto

10. Humour

...which annoyingly, you can't really capture in a photograph. But it is something that first attracts me to a guy - forget all the physical features, if you can make me laugh, then you're 99% of the way there my friend. 

I hope the man-porn has spiced up your otherwise uneventful Wednesday night, ladies. Gents...some food for thought, I guess. Just don't think about swapping teams; the gay community's far too good-looking already.

Love,

Belle x

Holiday Survival Guide

Unless you're an 18th century orphan, have been disowned, or are doing Xmas with 'the other half' this year, most of us will be at home for the holidays. While Christmas is essentially a time for family and "sharing the love", we all know this time of year can be a breeding ground for stress, awkward family politics, anger, and - sometimes - tears. To help you manoeuvre this tricky period, I have put together a little list of the Pros & Cons of the Festive Season to prepare you for any potential home-grown disaster...

All picture credits: theoatmeal.com

Merry Christmas to you and your families, I hope you have a great one.

Love,

Belle x

Unlikely People I Find Attractive

Everybody's got a weird crush. Those people who you shouldn't find attractive - but you...just...do? Just to be clear - these are not people who I would want to jump into bed with. I just find them strangely sexy, in an "I've admired you from afar" kind of way. Actually that sounds a bit rape-y. Before I say something I'll regret, here is my list of Unlikely People I Find Attractive...

1. Prince Charles / President Obama / David Cameron

It's not a power thing. It's a voice thing. All these men have really nice voices. I bought Obama's audiobook just to listen to his sultry tones - I couldn't have cared less about the dreams of his father, or whatever the book was on. And Prince Charles has that big-eared bumbly thing going on - kind of like Hugh Grant, but instead of getting caught with prostitutes, he goes round villages and taste-tests their organic ales and hams. Ah-mazing. David Cameron is simply a DILF. Say what you like about him re: running the country, but if he turned up to one of your sports days, you would want to be at his picnic.

2. V / Batman / Darth Vader

All girls love a bad boy, but I like mine in a mask. Not in a weird fetish way, just in the sense that they can't let you see their real faces because they're such badasses. Also Batman has a cool car. Speaking of cars...

3. Jeremy Clarkson

I like cars. Jeremy Clarkson likes cars, and knows a lot about them. He's also an asshole. I like that. I like the fact that he's 50-something and still smokes, drinks and behaves like a teenager. You say mid-life crisis, I say strangely attractive.

4. Jack Whitehall / John Richardson

If you can make me laugh, the battle is halfway done - and these guys make me LOL like no other. They're also both kind of socially awkward, which I can relate to and pretend that if I met them in real life we'd be BFF's. 

5. Keith Richards (then, now, always...)

So he looks like your mum's leather handbag. Who cares? He practically invented Rock n Roll, and is the only man I know that can pull off 'guyliner' with any credibility. Also, if he's still smoking at his age, there's hope for all of us.

6. Rowan Atkinson

I like a man who can take the mick out of himself; who doesn't take himself too seriously. Rowan Atkinson does this better than anyone. Johnny English's heroic stupidity? Hilarious. Mr Bean's faces? Priceless. Blackadder? Genius. And him doing his bit at the Olympic Opening Ceremony set my heart a-flutter.

7. Piers Morgan

I have absolutely no idea why.

Who are your weird crushes?

Love,

Belle x