Everybody's got a weird crush. Those people who you shouldn't find attractive - but you...just...do? Just to be clear - these are not people who I would want to jump into bed with. I just find them strangely sexy, in an "I've admired you from afar" kind of way. Actually that sounds a bit rape-y. Before I say something I'll regret, here is my list of Unlikely People I Find Attractive...
1. Prince Charles / President Obama / David Cameron
It's not a power thing. It's a voice thing. All these men have really nice voices. I bought Obama's audiobook just to listen to his sultry tones - I couldn't have cared less about the dreams of his father, or whatever the book was on. And Prince Charles has that big-eared bumbly thing going on - kind of like Hugh Grant, but instead of getting caught with prostitutes, he goes round villages and taste-tests their organic ales and hams. Ah-mazing. David Cameron is simply a DILF. Say what you like about him re: running the country, but if he turned up to one of your sports days, you would want to be at his picnic.
2. V / Batman / Darth Vader
All girls love a bad boy, but I like mine in a mask. Not in a weird fetish way, just in the sense that they can't let you see their real faces because they're such badasses. Also Batman has a cool car. Speaking of cars...
3. Jeremy Clarkson
I like cars. Jeremy Clarkson likes cars, and knows a lot about them. He's also an asshole. I like that. I like the fact that he's 50-something and still smokes, drinks and behaves like a teenager. You say mid-life crisis, I say strangely attractive.
4. Jack Whitehall / John Richardson
If you can make me laugh, the battle is halfway done - and these guys make me LOL like no other. They're also both kind of socially awkward, which I can relate to and pretend that if I met them in real life we'd be BFF's.
5. Keith Richards (then, now, always...)
So he looks like your mum's leather handbag. Who cares? He practically invented Rock n Roll, and is the only man I know that can pull off 'guyliner' with any credibility. Also, if he's still smoking at his age, there's hope for all of us.
6. Rowan Atkinson
I like a man who can take the mick out of himself; who doesn't take himself too seriously. Rowan Atkinson does this better than anyone. Johnny English's heroic stupidity? Hilarious. Mr Bean's faces? Priceless. Blackadder? Genius. And him doing his bit at the Olympic Opening Ceremony set my heart a-flutter.
7. Piers Morgan
I have absolutely no idea why.
Who are your weird crushes?