This weekend, awake at around 3am (the magic time when the best conversations are had), I was asked whether I believed in "the right person, or the right time". Well, being such a firm believer in fate, but also a hopeless romantic, this posed quite a conundrum...
We've all heard the saying - or variations of - "love turns up when you're not looking". Similarly, we're familiar with the phrase "Mr Right-Now" (as opposed to Mr Right). So how do we know whether it is the right time? I had a boyfriend when I was 17, my most serious relationship to date. We went out for three years, and he treated me quite wonderfully for a teenager. We met at a festival that I hadn't planned on going to, which I had a long and tedious journey to get to (nearly throwing in the towel around 9 hours in), and which he made a terrible first impression at. Over the course of the weekend we discovered these strange, unusual links to each other - more than just mutual friends - and kindled a friendship which blossomed into something more. We were loved by each other's families, got along with each other's friends, and made plans (as young teens in love do) for our futures - marriage, children's names, the lot. For all intensive purposes, he was Mr Right. But it wasn't the right time. So I guess he must fall under the category of 'Right Person, Wrong Time'. My second most notable relationship was with my best friend. We'd known each since we were 14, and, like most intoxicated kids in parks past their curfew, we had a few drunken kisses back in the day, but subsequently had always been in relationships. Last year was the first time we'd ever been single at the same time, and, perhaps longing for those hazy days of cheap booze bought with a fake ID, we decided it was the 'right time' to give it a shot. Well, perhaps it was the right time, but it was a case of the wrong person. So to answer the question posed to me: I suppose I believe in the combination of Right Person and Right Time. My boyfriend's parents first met each other 10 years before they were married, but fate prized them apart, setting their stories aside until the 'right time'. In the interim, they got on with their lives, but still kept that door ajar - for no particular reason apart from the way they had felt when they were together. Perhaps that's why I prefer to keep on good terms with those exes that have treated me well; to keep the door open in case they were the right people, it just wasn't the right time. Maybe it's the hopeless romantic in me, but wouldn't that be a great story?
My conversation reminded me of a picture I had seen whilst doing my weekly 'StumbleUpon':
So go out, live, and have faith that what you're doing is leading to something great. Remember - the best stories are not "we met online through a shared interest in desperation", but "we'd been taking the same bus for years, and it took a dropped phone to get us talking". Right person. Right time.
What's your view?