You Will Need:
1 x Butternut Squash (have a competition with yourself and try and pick the biggest one.)
4 x Pears (2 x smooth-skinned, 2 x rough-skinned - I do not know the actual names of the type of pear, I have a life.)
1 x WHITE ONION (not in the photo, hence why I've capitalised it here)
CHICKEN STOCK (also not in the photo...I wasn't very on it)
Sour Cream (Greek Yoghurt if you prefer/are weird)
[Oil, Salt & Pepper]
What To Do:
1. Peel the Butternut Squash. This can be a long and tedious process, especially if you won the competition and picked a monstrously large one. Put on some Masterchef and get stuck in.
2. Once peeled, dice the Squash into roughly inch-shaped cubes - obviously discarding the seeds, or putting them aside so you can grow your own squashes in your window box.
3. Heat up some oil and butter (salted, obviously) in a large pan. A pan big enough to fit a baby in. (No babies were harmed in the making of this recipe)
4. When the butter's just about melted, chuck in the HUGE PILE of diced Squash, and pop a lid on it.
5. While it's doing its thing, peel and dice a White Onion. Add to the squash when it's just beginning to soften. Here's some I made earlier...
6. Peel the rough-skinned pear and dice. Ignore mental jokes about 'lovely pear'. You don't have to peel the smooth-skinned pear, just dice that.
7. Add to the pan.
8. Boil a Kettle and add it to a Chicken Stock cube. If you're rich, you can use those Knorr jellies, or perhaps you already make your own - in which case...good for you.
9. Once the stock cube has dissolved/you've finished patting yourself on the back about your homemade stock, add it to the pan. You don't need much, only about an inch and a half. It doesn't need to fully cover the veg. Add a VERY TINY sprinkle of Nutmeg, as well as a good crack of Pepper.
10. Have a cigarette/drink.
11. Once the Butternut Squash is edible, but not soggy, dust off your blender and turn off the stove. Ladle as much of the veg as you can into the mixer, add a squeeze of lemon juice and a dash of single cream - and BLEND! The soup should be thick and heartwarming.
12. Pour into bowls, top with some sour cream and coriander (optional), and serve with some warm bread rolls with lots of butter...